I needed to hear this 15 yrs ago.
I really want to share a little somethin’ somethin’ with you.
Ok here it goes….and please stay with me while I explain! THEY DON’T KNOW SHIT. And I think one of the most common ways we self-sabotage is living in servitude to the POWER OF THEY. This shows up in two main ways:
#1. What would THEY think?
How many times have you done or NOT done something because of what you think others would think? This may be bold of me but is it possible that, in some cases, you create stories for yourself about what others would think to keep you comfortable with NOT having to take action for what you say you want?
For example. I didn’t think someone I admired really thought I was capable so I DIDN’T try to get the gig that I really wanted (‘cause my story at the time was that there was no point if “they” didn’t want me there). The end result? I DIDN’T TRY SO I DIDN’T GET.
With awareness you can create change. So if you intuitively know you have created a story about what “they” might think as an excuse to not step up to your possibility….STOP DOING IT. Take action for what you want. How do you do that? One small step at a time (courage, confidence and clarity will come with action…not before it)
#2. What would THEY do?
You know what is crazy-ass exhausting? Trying to live life based on what other people are doing. Personally, when I start making decisions based on the business and lifestyle practices of other people I begin to lose connection with my unique way of being.
Being inspired by other people is a good thing. My sister n law is so obsessed with Gillian Harris she will pretty much buy anything that woman endorses on Instagram. BUT while she admires Gillian she is also confident and expressive in her own right. Her admiration for another person does not diminish her fashionista awesome-ness.
It only becomes a problem when we become so engrossed with what we think about another person that we begin to compare and hide behind the stories we have created in our minds. AND THEY ARE STORIES!
Have you ever done this? Instead of being inspired you feel inadequate. It’s a mental roller coaster of “not enough”. This mindset sucks the life out of your light and all that jealousy/shame detracts from your success. It just does. It’s just not fun.
With awareness you can create change. Next time you feel yourself being sucked into the vortex of comparison and shame….STOP DOING IT. Take action for what you want. Focus on doing one thing today that makes you feel more alive and healthy. Show yourself some love. You can do one thing. #yesyoucan
Remember—THEY DON’T KNOW SHIT. Stop looking for approval and acceptance from others. You are worth more than that and only you know what is best for you. You can not acquire faith in yourself from “them” (it must come from you beautiful). Stop hiding behind the expectations of others and don’t let other people’s excuses, successes, beliefs and actions get in the way of you creating the live you know you want to live. AND YOU DESERVE.
Let go of what you think THEY SAY & DO and starting owning what YOU KNOW YOU NEED TO DO.
PS. This is the pep talk I NEEDED when I first started in the speaking biz. My God it would have saved me so much wasted energy! Hope it serves you. xoxoxo